i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
Michelle found a bong in the garbage and sold it to my mom
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
The worst part of it is that he's not the first man I've fucked with 2+ chihuahua's.
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
Randomize
