Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
For using a life jacket as a pillow, I slept pretty good last night...
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
I don't know. What do people who don't get stoned do?
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize
