No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
apparently i broke a 100 dollar bill to tip the bartender on a free drink
ugly people sure do ruin things
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
When else am I ever going to have a chance to do lines with T-Pain?
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
I think I wrote "thanks for the free alcohol!!!" in their wedding guest book and I'm almost positive I signed my name
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
Randomize
