i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
its not stalking. its research.
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
Its a sad day when your bush has a better set of hair than you do
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
i'm sitting in class and looking at who would die if all the fans suddenly fell from the ceiling. i guess i have next year to pass history..
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
I told him he looked like my uncle.
Why would you say that in a bathtub?
I should probably just LinkedIn request everyone I've ever slept with so they stop popping up on my suggested connections list
Randomize