when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
"tonights gonna be a goodnight" was blasting at the club while i was screaming "NO ITS NOT" and crying. How do you think it went?
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
we're ranked number 5 for having the most pot in the country for a university school. idk if i should feel worried or just plain blessed.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Randomize
