Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
Nothing says fuck you quite like putting your used condom in someones mailbox for them to find in the morning.
Some chick just tried to plug her vodka into the wall.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
My boyfriend correctly calculated the time I would be out of alcohol and showed up about four minutes after I'd run out with two bottles of wine. I think this is love.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Randomize
