OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
I started singing the national anthem on a train in London. Happy 4th of July assholes
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
Randomize
