I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
Walked up in time to hear him say "you saw I was in a relationship on facebook? So why are you holding my nuts?" To her. That's loyalty man
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
I woke up and finished the bottle like a champ
If people had ratings on Tinder I'd give you 5 out of 5 stars.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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