Goodnight my chunky, little, marshmallow muncher
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
Just saw my bank statement. It literally goes liquor store pizza place liquor store pizza place bar bar bar liquor store pizza place 711 for snacks withdrawl for drugs rinse and repeat
This is your monthly public service announcement that sexual services will temporarily cease from Wednesday night to Monday. Please plan accordingly and have a nice day =D
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
As a gentleman, I asked her if she was sure and she just whispered "wreck me" in my ear. I took that as a green light.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
