i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
He referred to his penis as "a gentle giant" and said I had offended it
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Accidentally mixed my gin with cold brew coffee instead of cranberry juice. It’s bad. But I’ll finish it. Never leave a fallen soldier.
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize