Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
ttyl tear gas
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize