I realized today that the only reason you made out with Travis is because he has nice teeth
this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
Every bathroom has like throw up and like bagels in it. Richie didn't even have bagels.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
I'm over here trying to figure out how to get shake shack delivered to my bed and Jamie is having a child
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Randomize
