Just saw the pics you left in my phone. thanks for reminding me that last night was not a dream.
Well i just learned hong kong is a country...thank you olympics
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Randomize
