i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Non-Jews are for practice
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
I made friends with the delivery guy because he had beautiful dread locks and was a Zelda fan. He texted me after he left saying he wasn't trying to be creepy but we should be friends. We're hanging out tomorrow.
How does this kind of shit happen to you?!
Do you think I could get someone from tinder to drive me to the airport?
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
Did we kick in my basement door last night?
Yes. I think you actually bought tennis shoes specifically for that application.
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