she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Good luck! Who knows he might be a stallion in the bedroom! or it could be like having sex with a crayon.
So, Southern Comfort will donate 25 cents for every bottle sold towards Gulf Coast Relief... Can we save the wetlands through my alcoholism?
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
I spilled a whole plate of queso and salsa on my bed so I'm just eating it off my sheets with chips. How's your night going?
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
He fucked me while I was smoking his blunt. His apartment was trashed and he drives a van that looks like it’s been hit by a train but still 10/10 would fuck again.
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