Let's just say there's a reason that "suede" rhymes with "laid".
areolas are like halos for boobs.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
You stood next to him taking HUGE gasps of air in an attempt to second hand smoke his cig because you didn't have one...
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
Randomize
