the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
I was Jaeger weird. I was rolling on the floor pretending to be an Olympic gymnast and my name was Gina
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
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