U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
The toilet started ringing, I think I just found your phone.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
So someone just pointed out to me that during dinner, I mentioned more women that I'm attracted to than men. The transition might be complete. I'm gay.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
I only know two things that kitchen floors are good for... sex and quesadillas that got dropped. You know, the five second rule
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
the fact that you beer bonged rum made me so proud, the fact that you threw up an entire footlong tuna melt after... not so much babe
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