Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
My vag has a bald spot. That is so middle aged. Is this my midlife crisis?
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
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