i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
strippers are much less mysterious after you sleep with them
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
Every time I try to do something productive I end up searching ghost porn.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
