Whenever I'm sad I just imagine if babies were born with mustaches...
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
The one time my sister did shrooms she thought she was thumbalina. I can't live my life that way
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
I don't know how to reply to him. 'I'm glad the ecstasy my friend tricked you into taking wore off'...? It just doesn't seem sincere
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
Randomize
