how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
She has the best kind of daddy issues
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
Randomize
