This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
she looks like stephen colbert with that blond wig he was wearing last night.
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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