You really coming over, don't trick.
Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
I think the fact that I shit my pants, threw away my underwear in a frat bathroom, lost my socks down a drain in the front yard and still got laid... deserves some sort of a victory drink for myself or a blowjob for him since he was such a good sport.
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
If you're wondering about the mess, we had sex in the kitchen. There was noodles involved.
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
I just thought that if your brother was ever going to invite me over again, he probably shouldn't catch me fucking you in his bathroom.
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