Go to google and type XXX
.......Is that how you look for porn?
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
the cashier ate half of our fries before she gave them to us so i think it's safe to say they don't do drug testing there
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
Okay. So did I kiss you last night? I know that I made out with someone. Or a few someones. But I'm pretty sure that I made out with you. Was that real life?
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
