chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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