Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
I just realized i masturbated to the home shopping network. I either need to get a boyfriend asap, or a subscription to a porn website, or i just need to stop taking ambien
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
My day so far: morning after pill and pancakes. Living the dream.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
Randomize