will power is for people who don't want to get laid
She was hit by a car at 47 mph and lived. That explains everything.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
After last night, I've decided I will now bang only men who professionally ride things for a living. I will accept jockeys, cowboys, bullriders, and pro bicyclists who lie and say they're bullriders.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
Randomize
