He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
Nice. Ask if they watched saved by the bell. yes=legal. No=jailbait
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
Randomize
