I love watching others lives come down to our level.
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
Seriously. We gorilla glued our hands together. Eating pizza last night was impossible.
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
Randomize
