I don't know which is more embarrassing, the fact that I shat on the floor today or that I told you about it.
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.
Judging by the garbled spelling in the calendar reminders in my phone, drunk me really wanted sober me to take a pregnancy test today.
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
Randomize
