I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
you were feeling the wall and when we asked you why, you just said "because I want to know who lived here before"
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Of all the things I've masturbated to while high, my favorites are ritz chips and trees
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
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