I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
cell reception changed and I can no longer text you from the toilet... that means I'll be texting you less often, just fyi
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
Definitely just realized I wore a shirt that says "building leaders for Christ" to a hookup. Roll tide.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
I need you to know I’m weirdly very sexually attracted to Charlie Puth now
Randomize
