well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
If you really wanted to hide the fact you were gay, you could have at least had the sense to not get drunk in the same bar as your bf.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
Randomize
