is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
It's Friday. Sex?
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
Of all the things I am low enough to do, how could you even doubt if that was one of them?
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
It took me fifteen minutes to go from puking on my doorstep infront of my old lady neighbor to legit presentable person able to care for children. Bronzing powder and I deserve an award.
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
I'm not THAT invested in seeing you to an orgasm
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
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