Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
I think I love you, but I may be biased because we had pirate sex.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
Sabotage it. Cum quick. Make it awkward so you don't hurt her feelings. Who says nice guys finish last?
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
Randomize
