just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Well I just had a 45 minute conversation with a lady who was drunk off her ass complaining about how her 3 sons won't talk to her anymore. No more dive bars.
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
Randomize
