I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
and I didnt even know his name until this morning when we were laying in bed and he referred to himself in the 3rd person.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
There is no such thing as a great breathalizer story. That isn't a thing that exists.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
I threw up in bed last night and tried cleaning it with oldspice and baby powder
Remember the time you cried about coconuts
My cat took a shit on the guy who passed out in the bathtub
He ate me out in a limo while we were driving home. I love bars being open again!
Randomize
