and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
sometimes when i'm drunk i choose the spanish option on the ATM to challenge myself.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
Try to make ecstasy cheese. Capitalize on the molly and greek yogurt trends. MARKETING
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
I refuse to plan drunken casual sex. Just think of the monster I'd create.
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
Randomize
