so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
We role played last night. I was Brandon Inge and she was some slut from Toledo. Let's just say Triple A might not be so disappointing after all.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
I'd say it's a shame and a disservice to the world that we can't stay drunken shitshows to infinity
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
Randomize