My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
It was fun until I shot a pea out of my nose while throwing up. Left over tuna casarole at 3Am was a terrible choice.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Randomize
