Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
We ran out of vodka, so instead of body shots you wanted to do cupcake shots off her naked body...happy birthday to you.
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
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