Dude I wish you were here. I'm innthe back seat and it looks like outer space and everything feels like rice. idk. wtf.
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
I feel like I could have been bitchier and missed an opportunity.
Hey kevin, it's Ashlee. I have been trying to get ahold of you. Your pledge gave me your number. I really wanted to apologize for shitting in your car I'll buy new upholstery or pay to have it shampooed if needed. I'm so embarrassed.
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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