It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
Its official... I need to stop being so slutty.. the guy I had sex with on friday delivered my jimmy johns tonight.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
Randomize
