There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
Today's walk of shame includes last nights hair and make up, an 8 hour shift, me leading a meeting and me throwing up in a parking lot on my way to work. Dear world, you're welcome.
I hate to stick you with the friend but I did all the work.
I could fuck to npr.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
Randomize
