So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
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