Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
It's official. I am the proud owner of his very own sex tape. Amateur awesome porn or awful delete-me-now porn? Come over help me decide.
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
Apparently at 2 AM I decided to let the world know about my newfound love for elephants
I'm ordering sushi and crying over finals. Come over and bring wine.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
She demanded to see my stimulus package, I had to go over.
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