He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
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