I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Do you remember Kelly my alter personality? She talked like a man and would sing amazing grace?
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
Randomize
