Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
Where can I buy a trophy for a Groupie Award?
She had sex with a merch guy. . . band guys make you groupies, Merch guys just means she's easy.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
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