11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
Woke up to a break up text for a facebook relationship I didn't even know I was in... 2012 is going to be a good year
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
Randomize