My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
Change the recording on your voicemail. He found your number and my ass print on the car hood.
Beer bonging to Ave Maria
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
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