Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
Randomize
